Halala Mama

It’s funny how if you play with a picture enough, edit it enough, it looks like a sweet tender moment between mother and son…  Instead of a 3 year old who was avoiding bedtime by pretending to sleep and making noises that sounded like “konk-shuuuu,  kkonk-shhhuuuu.”

Before I actually had a child, I felt pretty well prepared for this parenthood thing.  I’ve watched my friends go through it.  I’ve gleaned so much information from them I should give them credit on a daily basis.  I read books.  I set rules.  I scheduled naptimes, mealtimes, and things flowed reasonably well.

Then febrile seizures.  Then multiple, severe food allergies.  And now, a not so febrile seizure.

And I am out there making my own path now.  None of my closest friend’s parenting experience compares to this; the guiding path of collective wisdom I was following has disappeared.  And to be honest, these days, I feel a little numb.

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Adam will have an MRI on Friday.  The only way to perform this test on a child is to sedate them.  He had one two years ago and I didn’t think the nurses were going to be able to get the IV in him.  He fought and he was strong.  Now he’s twice the weight and probably four times stronger.  This promises that some fun times lie ahead.

I choose to concentrate on getting him ready for the test now that he’s older and understands a little more.

I choose not to concentrate on the test itself.

The last one was clear and showed no brain abnormalities.  This one won’t either.  I’ve decided, and in truth, it’s not really expected.

I hope.

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Last Sunday, my own personal theme song was Lady Gaga’s On the Edge of Glory, except the only part that played on loop was “on the edge the edge the edge the edge the edge…”  because I was definitely on the edge.

A solid week of increased Keppra – seizure medicine for Adam – brought a week of heinous behavior from him.  I try not to explain away his honest bad behavior by blaming medicinal side effects. Sometimes he IS just rotten and rambunctious and oh so sweet at the same time.  But after he was in time out six times within two hours on Sunday night and did little but glower at me the rest of the evening, I decided to give in and call the doctor.

She suggested 50 mg of vitamin B6 each morning.  Just let the tablet dissolve in juice, give it to him, and see how it goes. Some families see huge behavioral improvement, some do not.  Give it about three weeks, she suggested.

On Monday morning we gave him his first dose and when I picked him up Monday afternoon from preschool, I got a glowing report about his behavior.  He was perfectly compliant at school.  I took him home and he proclaimed his love for me multiple times, ate his dinner, and when before bed he came out and cleaned up his own toys without being asked, I thought the Rapture was at hand.

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I am cautiously optimistic.